>How to Build Confidence in Your Child

>How to Build Confidence in Your Child

So here’s a common question asked during parent/teacher interviews:

“How can I build my child’s confidence?”

What a great question. I mean who doesn’t want a happy, healthy, confident child?!???!?! …. it seems to me that confidence is 3/4 of any “battle”.

Anyway, I was thinking about all of the things that I have told parents over the years… and guess what? It’s all just common sense … nothing that those very same parents could and would not have told me themselves had the tables been turned … which, when you think about it, makes good sense.

(Aside: Common sense is probably another one of those terribly underrated concepts ….)

So, once I started to compile the list below I couldn’t seem to stop … YEESH!!! Good thing it’s cocktail hour in my home! Time to relax with friends and a Candy Cane Martini (P.’s fab recipe!). (Hey! Teachers party too! …. or didn’t you know??? tee-hee …)

P.S. I just re-read this post … & PHEW …. I’m exhausted ... this is an awful lot to tackle! Really … read, enjoy, agree, disagree, consider the
possibilities.

BUILDING CONFIDENCE IN YOUR CHILD:

(A) LOVE & ENCOURAGEMENT
Love them.
Praise them.
Encourage independence.
Encourage a strong, “contained” sense of self-worth & confidence.
Get to know them: Their friends, games, music, TV shows … who they are, what they do, what they love …
Set the stage for a great life … Be firm, be realistic & then : Laugh. Smile. Play.

(B) STRUCTURE
Provide structure. Set boundaries.
Be consistent.
Keep promises.
Discuss your values, set your rules – state/explain your expectations – review them often.
Provide rewards & consequences when necessary.
Be yourself.
Be a role model for your child.

(C) TEACH
Teach independence.
Teach responsibility.
Teach “stick with-ed-ness” e.g. When first you don’t succeed that’s OK, just try, try again.”
Teach self-control.
Teach right from wrong.
Teach respect (personal & for others).
Teach problem-solving skills and decision-making skills.
Teach and model good conversations skills and active listening skills.
Teach them (& this is an important one!) that there are things in life that they have control over and can change, and there are those things that they
simply must accept. (This can be a tough pill to swallow … goodness knows I need to review this one myself every once in a while!!!)

PROVIDE
… opportunities to see new things, meet new people, try new foods, etc.
… a safe, secure environment (emotionally, physically … you know the drill 😉
… opportunities to take risks.
… opportunities to learn new skills.
… opportunities to practice new skills.
… push a little when appropriate … be never too much.
… opportunities for success.
… opportunities to learn from mistakes … and to be OK with that.
… choices for your child – but never too many. Always remember that you are “the boss”.

OVERALL
Be warm. Be firm. Be silly.
Be serious. Be honest. Be realistic.
Be empathetic. Be patient.
Be an explorer.
Live, laugh, love, learn ….
Be yourself!
They are great, and so are you!

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3 responses to “>How to Build Confidence in Your Child

  1. >Wow, I love it Alison! I'm going to print it out and put it somewhere where I can see it often!Love Tanya

  2. >Thanks Tanya … you are an such AMAZING mum …. & so I'll take this as a compliment! xo

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